My boyfriend doesn’t play by the rules

I’ve been caught up in Olympic fever (it’s happening in my backyard y’all!) and before we delve further into that in a later post (if there is a later post) I thought I’d write a thing or two about dating and dating rules.

I’ve dated my share of men. I’m not that kind of girl who goes around and dates a ton of people, but I have dated quite a few to know what I like and what I look for in a man.

The Boyfriend is German. This means he automatically gets an A+ from me for honesty, loyalty, efficiency, hardworking, good temper and being well mannered and for having an excellent attitude. After knowing him for a year and a half, he has always been all of these things and has been patient and good tempered even when I was

a) crying while driving in a car (I was stressed out and didn’t know where we were – even worse, I was stressed out because I was driving next to a German, and as we all know Germans can drive)
b) being generally rude and sore because something has irritated me, or because I had a bad case of PMS
c) making a big fuss out of nothing and/or being inexplicably jealous

The thing that surprised me when The Boyfriend dated me was he actually treated me well. He doesn’t believe and has probably never heard of any dating rules. When I met him, I threw my own set of be-careful-with-men rules out of the window because I knew I could trust him. He never waited 3 days to call me after our first date – he asked me out the next day, and I was pleasantly surprised by how sincere he was and I already liked him then so I said yes. He didn’t believe in waiting 6 months or 1 year to say “I love you”. He said it when he felt like he was falling in love with me – on our 3rd date. (I didn’t say it back then.) Usually, that would scare me off, but I thought it was charming. I thought it wasn’t possible to know so early that you’re falling in love with someone. But it worked out.

I didn’t feel like I had to be anyone else, or that I couldn’t say what I thought right from the start. I’ve dated a majority of men who have last minute plans for dates. They would call and I had to be there in 20 minutes. That didn’t go down with me very well. I like planning things, and I’ve met my match with The Boyfriend who, being German, loves to plan anything and everything above all. To know someone as anal as I am about planning is a pleasure. We both are control freaks over details of our lives (I more so than him). I love surprise dates, so when The Boyfriend plans one, everything is meticulous down to the T, from which table we’re going to sit at the restaurant (the one by the river, duh!) to how he’s going to surprise me (how we’ll get there etc). The little things count too of course. So you can imagine how delighted I was when The Boyfriend said, “I’ll be there at 1pm” and he was there at 1pm SHARP, no cancellations and no lateness. If security is your thing and you like to feel secure, I absolutely recommend German men. They are like classics that will never go out of style.

I must say though that men like my boyfriend seem to be a dying breed. Some guys are born to be douches, some guys learn how to be douches, some douches become nice guys again which is very rare – but send me a thank you because they probably went through my school of rehabilitation because when they do something that isn’t by my rules I basically kick them out of this world. And they can never expect to crawl back into my life.


Back to point #1 – I found out that Germans are honest prior to meeting The Boyfriend because I have a couple of friends from that area. Look, I’m not calling anyone dishonest and I’m trying my best not to make a huge generalisation here about one particular country. All I’m saying is that I found out that these people – my boyfriend included – are trustworthy. (Except for one bitch who tried to steal my boyfriend but that’s another story.) I don’t know if it boils down to the individual or if birds of a feather flock together, but The Boyfriend has, to the best of my knowledge, been honest. That’s one thing he triumphed over the other guys I’ve dated. He never cancelled a date on me, or postponed it because “he had to help a friend” or *insert some other lame excuse*. I’m still in awe of the fact that when he makes plans, he is just right there and so reliable. I thought that would at least be the least you can expect from a guy – to be honest – but turns out it is so hard to find a guy with this trait! He’s not flirted with any girls or did anything to make me feel insecure – not even behind my back (oh and trust me, I know), and to me that is an incredible trait.

The Boyfriend does not have a jealous bone. Believe me, I have tried. I have tried, long and hard, to find a way to get through to his head, but he is just incredibly secure of himself.

Example 1. We were at Starbucks and he was buying coffees to take away so I sat at the bar people watching when this guy comes up to me and tries to hit on me. I pointed at my boyfriend and said “That’s my boyfriend” and he runs away. When I told The Boyfriend, he thought it was funny. Funny, really! If the roles were reversed, I would have stalked out of Starbucks, hunted the girl down and kicked her ass.

Example 2. Someone I used to date was in town and wanted to meet me (we’re friends and it didn’t work out for us when we dated) so I told The Boyfriend who said ok. He didn’t even bat an eyelid.

My girlfriends and I have been trying to examine this strange phenomenon of why my boyfriend is so secure and we came up with nothing.

I feel like some kind of cell phone user trying to find a flaw in this impeccable man, but he’s just like that. I know he’s not some girl’s type (thank God!!) but he is so my type. I like that we are best friends as much as we are a couple and I just hope that there are many more days to come where I can enjoy the company of this wonderful man 🙂


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